Onei’s 15-rune Travel Guide on Thrilling Ventures in the Demonic Funhouses - FeSu^Jiyva

Version 0.29: This article may not be up to date for the latest stable release of Crawl.

This article contains advice from other players, which may be subjective, outdated, inaccurate or ill-advised. Take advice as you see fit, and read at your own risk!

This walkthrough builds onto the 3-rune FeSu guide written by yours truly. It is recommended that you consult it before proceeding with this sequel, unless you are simply interested in general, non-Felid specific (psh!) advice on clearing the extended endgame of 0.29/0.30, including the extra spicy realms of Hell and all its denizens.

I once again reiterate that less experienced players are encouraged to attempt this strategy (starting with the first instalment of this guide), and should not be fooled by the sadly-too-common belief that Felids are “too hard for me”! Even one game of the squishiest race in all of DCSS brings many important lessons that will be applicable to any character. You may not win your very first game of FeSu, but you will learn to not treat every enemy in the same fashion, use a varied toolkit to deal with squishy casters and sturdy brutes in unique ways, and discover the secret power of running away from your problems.

The Journey Ahead

The "extended endgame" is a rather controversial topic among the community of Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup. Some call it an "exercise in tedium", others, a "dull fest of exploding popcorn until you fall asleep and lose your 7 hour run". That may be true if you are some Minotaur Fighter sweating all over your crystal plate armour with 99 AC, 350 HP and a holy brand sword, or generic blaster caster #3029459 who has replaced every instance of "Hello" in their vocabulary with "Iron Shot" and "Shatter".

I personally find it exciting, full of surprises and a worthy final challenge for this infamously difficult video game. As a cat, you will constantly be tiptoeing the line between life and death, between supreme power and debilitating weakness; you will laugh as you oneshot, and cry as you are oneshotted. You will experience failure - but unlike any other DCSS character, there's always the next life to redeem your worth. You will never truly fall asleep with explosions bringing you to double-digit HP constantly, but will also not lose your entire run because of a simple mistake. And if you find yourself reincarnated a few too many times, you can realize you've bitten off more than you can chew, and leave with the runes you've collected so far.

But you won't do that, won't you?

You'll squeeze in just one more melee attack on the 10% HP Ereshkigal when you have zero lives remaining.

I would too.

Interdimensional Travel Checklist (or when should one attempt the extended endgame)

Now, not every kitty is enough of a tiger to test their mettle against the endless legions of Hell, the entire Egyptian pantheon contained within the Tomb, and the disco-party colourful inhabitants of Pandemonium. Sometimes, it’s best to swallow up your pride, collect 3-5 runes of Zot, and leave the holy crusades to your next karmic reincarnation. Here are some basic guidelines – these are listed in order of importance, from practically obligatory clauses to strong, but not forced recommendations.

• You should not be a pure summoner. You may be laughing as you watch a helpless golden dragon batter against your eldritch tentacles and your tentacled monstrosities, but your chuckling will quickly come to its end once your entire army gets ignored while demons play cooking chef with your HP bar: cut in half with Torment, cook to well-done with Damnation, season with Smite, serve. It is strongly recommended to have some kind of tool to rapidly delete scattered, low-HP but high-damage enemies across the screen (here’s a clue: it starts with Manifold and it ends with Assault). Otherwise, your journey will resemble what a level 1 character would experience going through a Dungeon where every enemy is an orc priest.
• You should have at least one life left by the time you have cleared Zot:5. Death comes quick in the scream-laden halls of Pandemonium (where you will begin your quest for that elusive 8th rune), and sometimes, taking the one-way portal will immediately materialize you in Cerebov’s sleeping room as he is listening to pop music. As it is against the Demonic Code to listen to anything else than death metal, he will proceed to blast you with three million damage Fire Storms until he is certain no witnesses have been left alive. Hence the reason why you should ensure such a twisted farce of fate will not cause the end of your 3+ hours run.
• You should have interesting artifact jewellery with at least rF+/rC+/rN+ on it. Akin to the portal vaults you may have encountered at the start of your journey (such as the Ice Cave that, I repeat, you should NOT go into, EVER), the branches of the extended endgame possess elemental themes. The branch of Gehenna, for example, is fully designed around pyroclastic missiles, exploding fireballs and raging infernos of blazing flame. Wearing even a simple basic rF+ ring here is practically equivalent to doubling your max HP. However, wearing such a boring and mundane ring will strip you out of your Slaying/Intelligence bonuses, significantly cutting your damage output and making you eat more fire blasts from the enemies surviving your unimpressive kitty-tickles, thus returning you to square 1. The sum of your 2 rings and amulet should be granting you at least one + of resistance to the element of the branch you are exploring, and provide substantial support to your combat and spells.
• You should have access to Death's Door The extended endgame is designed to kill you. There used to be a time where it was a dull, monotonous stream of rolling one’s face on the keyboard (and privileging TAB and O as impact locations), but recent changes are slowly turning the nether reaches into a never-ending stream of Zot:5-style death traps with machiavellian gimmicks. The answer to such villainy, of course, is to load your arsenal with the most overpowered spell in the game and chuckle as you press a button and literally become invincible for 20 turns.
• You should be worshipping Jiyva. Gozag is a fantastic divine patron, and the power of the rich is many times over sufficient to carry any character through the game. However, once you enter the extended endgame, battles will elongate from small hallway skirmishes to all-out bloodbaths in wide, open rooms. Your HP and MP reserves will be constantly put to the test, and it is crucial to have some way to replenish them constantly (this is why The Shining One is so popular for melee 15-rune games!). Aside from your gooey body constantly reconstructing itself, Jiyva brings many extremely important assets to the hell-diver, notably the pacification of amorphous enemies (in a place where the confusion/paralysis dispensed by floating eyes can be an instant death sentence), and the passive removal of negative mutations, which can be a run-ender for any other character. One realm of Pandemonium in particular is specifically designed to convert even an Übermensch into a pile of weeping flesh that teleports every 5 turns into death traps. (This is the reason why Zin is a popular alternative choice for melee 15-rune games!)

Gozag is definitely viable for a 15-rune game, but this is MY guide and I get to choose the flavour of eternal celestial servitude.

The Demonic Exposure Risk Self-Assessment Test

This test is to be taken before entering Hell. Abyss & Vaults:5 are not as dangerous.

The paragon of the 15-rune FeSu run experience has:

• Storm Form
• Wereblood
• Manifold Assault (please give up now if you lack this spell)
• Death's Door (it can be at 100% failure rate right now, it just needs to be in your library)
• Fighting/Dodging/Unarmed Combat all at 21 or above
• 2 lives remaining
• The divine support of Jiyva at 5 or 6 stars of piety
• A sum of Dexterity and Intelligence scores equal or above 45

I will be writing this guide through the perspective of one such character. Those who stray from the One True Righteous Lightning Paw Path will need to adapt. If this is the very first time you are going into the Extended Endgame, it is strongly recommended that you gather all of the pieces on this list.

Possible replacements:

• Storm Form - Statue Form or Dragon Form
• Death's Door - Dragon's Call or Borgnjor's Revivification
• Jiyva - Gozag
• 2 lives remaining - 1 life remaining + the Dreamshard Necklace
• Everything else is essential and cannot be replaced.

Keep in mind I believe you are actively reducing your chances of success with every deviation you dare take. It helps if you have really overpowered jewelry like the Amulet of Vitality, but barging into Cocytus in Dragon Form with no rC+ bonuses and no Death's Door is probably not so different from bringing your cats to a chocolate factory.

If you also want to complete a Ziggurat, you'll also need the following (once again, they only need to be available for memorization, not to have a high success rate right now):

• Death's Door
• Ignition
• Death Channel
• Either Animate Dead or Infestation
• Passage of Golubria or 8+ scrolls of blinking

Finally, these random spells are not necessary at all and cannot replace the items in the list of essentials, but can help push the odds in your favour. They are sorted from most desirable to most accessory:

• Blink
• Passage of Golubria
• Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling (-20 coolness points)
• Dispersal/Disjunction
• Summon Horrible Things
• Malign Gateway
• Silence (only for the Tomb)
• Death Channel (does not work in the Tomb)
• Summon Forest
• Yara's Violent Unravelling
• Enfeeble (-10 coolness points)
• Leda's Liquefaction

Characters who do not pass this test should immediately seize the Orb and flee, never to return. If you don’t care about winning and just want to do a casual tour through the headquarters of evil itself until you meet a grisly fate, though, be my guest.

Fighting Unfairness With Unfairness (or how to become literally invincible with Death’s Door)

Read only this section if you have found Death’s Door, or its lesser counterpart, Borgnjor’s Revivification.

Demons? More like EXP piñatas. If there’s one great thing about demon slaying, it’s that it lets one move from ignorance to mastery of any given topic in a matter of minutes. Of course, since you care little for education and self-improvement (or you wouldn’t be playing a 1997 png-crushing low-res battle game for hours), you will not be using this amazing property to discover fantastical medical cures or improve the human felid condition, but rather further increase your selfish rampage capabilities.

• Death’s Door (LV 9 Necro): Upon pressing the button mapped to this spell (and NOT the one next to it like I once did, summoning a cactus in front of Dispater only to have my head bashed in immediately afterwards), you will become invincible. Literally, bluntly, utterly invincible. If you successfully cast Death’s Door, you are GUARANTEED to not read that fateful “You die…” for at least the next dozen turns. This cannot be dispelled, cannot be cancelled, cannot be removed through any other means that the spell itself running its complete course - certainly more than 10 turns, but rarely above 25. Once the duration has reached its midway point, you will receive the message “Your time is quickly running out!” and see the status effect turn from white to grey – at this moment, you have around 5 to 10 turns remaining before your power fantasy expires.

Of course, there is a catch. Once this spell ends, you will be left at an utterly pitiful amount of HP, sufficiently low to be oneshotted by the tickling touch of a feather. There’s always the possibility of recasting the spell, but you are guaranteed to be left vulnerable (and unable to cast) for 1 to 3 turns after the end of the invincibility period. This is where feline supremacy wins again: whereas an ogre with 400 HP would dread having their best line of defence tumble on the cliff between life and death, the Most Blessed Velvet-Pawed Race has already been familiarized with the bony touch of oblivion many times over. Unlike every other race in the game, messing up a Death’s Door play will not necessarily result in the end of your run thanks to your extra lives, and, after all, who cares about having 17 HP? It’s not that much different from having 103. It’s like this spell was made for Felids!

The most obvious use of this valuable time is to retreat to the nearest upstairs in cases of trouble, clear out adjacent pursuers, then breathe deeply as you realize you’ve just saved your 7 hour run. However, there are more eccentric uses available for the reckless and bold (which you are, since you are attempting the extended endgame as a Felid). If you encounter a particularly nasty stairwell leading down into a horrible ambush, which you think would result in your instant death should you return into the fray, you can preemptively cast Death’s Door on top of the downstairs (and try not to wince at the ~95 damage this will inflict upon you), move down, move back up, mow down the opposition, rest, cast the spell again, and repeat until your 0-risk stair dancing strategy has completely cleaned out the welcoming party. I strongly recommend you resist the temptation of hazarding a press of “tab” or “p” after you have descended the stairs - moving up and down takes 2.5 turns, and if you’re unlucky enough to have your Death’s Door be at the minimum duration, there’s a non-zero possibility that you will run out of time as you are disposing of your pursuers, who will be overjoyed to oneshot you. Move down, move up, kill, repeat. Nothing more.

Do NOT rely on a >20% failure rate Death’s Door for escape purposes. It WILL fail in your face, and you WILL be sad that you didn’t just use a 100% success rate traditional escape method instead. Don’t try to “save up Blink scrolls” by rolling the dice on Death’s Door – once it’s castable, you’ll be relying much less on those Blink scrolls. Only tempt fate if you truly have no other options.

• Borgnjor’s Revivification (LV 8 Necro): This is a bootleg, 50% off Death’s Door. These two spells are very commonly found together, so this is mostly used as a bridge between not having Death’s Door and having it, quickly forgotten with an Amnesia scroll once you can replace it with its superior counterpart. It will come online much earlier, making this an interesting option. On a successful cast, you will be instantly healed back to full health (though your status effects will remain in place). Once again, there is a catch - you will PERMANENTLY, and without any possible way of restoring them, lose a few points of maximum HP. The racial effectiveness of this spell is the opposite of Death’s Door – superbly effective for Ogres and the like, but unimpressive on a Felid where a full heal is an alternative way of saying “here’s 2 or 3 extra free turns until you die”. Still, those “2-3 turns” can be the difference between life and death – don’t be like me, at 8 HP left, 1v1ing an almost dead hellion with an 89% hit chance, and telling myself “surely I can’t miss this hit”. Use it. You’d need at least 10 Revivifications until you start to actually notice negative side effects and situations where you would have lived had you been greedier earlier. Anyways, once you have Death’s Door, those lost hit points will hardly matter, for even if you are a One Hitpoint Wonder, invincibility is still invincibility.

As a final note, know that casting Death’s Door, then Borgnjor’s Revivification while it is active, may make you feel really smart. The developers thought of that, of course. Do NOT ever do such a thing. You WILL be paralyzed. The duration of the paralysis is sufficient to extend past the entire duration of Death’s Door, making you receive enough damage to kill you many times over.

Finally, you should be relying on some of your good old spells, some of which will never lose their utility. To the extreme, the measly level 2 spells Blink and Wereblood remain invaluable. You should cast the latter before every single encounter.

Buckling Up for the Ride (or how to get started with transitioning from a 3-rune run)

Follow the FeSu gospel, ensuring you take the path of the Atlas, clear the Elven Halls in their entirety and eventually abandon Gozag. Before abandoning Gozag, make sure you buy Death's Door, Dragon's Call or Borgnjor's Revification if they're in any of your summoned Gozag Gacha Lootboxes, and also Ignition/Death Channel/Infestation/Animate Dead if you intend to complete a Ziggurat. Make sure to keep a Strength ring or two in your pack, preferably artefacts, but the +6 boring ones can do.

Instead of just training Unarmed Combat up to 27 once you reach Zot, however, follow the targets in the "Your Biggest Workout Yet" section below, no matter what.

Once you reach the point where you would normally pick up the Orb and ascend, do a 180° turn and head to Vaults:5 instead. It is not very dangerous at this stage of the game, so should you have only 1 life remaining, I welcome you to try, and nominate you as a truly courageous acolyte. Perhaps you will accumulate the experience required to regain a supplementary reincarnation and pass the Demonic Exposure Risk Self-Assessment Test!

I have already outlined a Vaults:5 clearing strategy under the Third Lock segment of my previous writings. Not much is different here, aside from the fact that you will not be relying on cracking open your wallet to pacify the hordes of guards found in this infamous level. Instead, you will be annihilating this level with your accumulated expertise from your foray into Zot. It can be tempting to not use a Teleportation scroll and to o-tab the entrance with Storm Form's cleaving, but a lot is still likely to go wrong - I advise putting your ego aside and clearing it the proper way. There will be times later more appropriate to feeling like an undefeatable god.

Once your fourth rune, the Silver rune, has been secured, it is time for the fun to truly begin.

Your Biggest Workout Yet

First, reach ALL of these skill targets before training anything else.

• Fighting: 21
• Dodging: 21
• Unarmed Combat: 21
• Spellcasting: 17

If using Storm Form:

• Air Magic: 19
• Transmutations: 19

If Manifold Assault is not at 100% spell power:

• Translocations until it is (check by pressing "I" twice).

Once you have secured the skilling targets outlined above, turn off ALL of your skills. Choose one of these ULTIMATE spells. These are ordered from best to worst - if you do not have the one mentioned by each bullet point, drop down to the next.

• Death's Door - train Necromancy. No target. We're riding this one to the top. OPTIMAL.
• Dragon's Call - train Summonings and set a target on level 24.
• Borgnjor's Revivification - train Necromancy and set a target on level 19.
• No ULTIMATE spell - train Unarmed Combat to 27, then Fighting/Dodging to 27. NOT RECOMMENDED.

Then, once your ULTIMATE SPELL is online:

• Unarmed Combat: 27

After you have truly improved your Fist Delivery Service beyond all mortal conception:

• Fighting: 27
• Dodging: 27

And if, after all that, godhood still isn't feeling powerful enough to you, choose one of the following:

• If you want to complete a Ziggurat, have Ignition available in your library, Death's Door memorized and online, and also have Death Channel:
  • Fire Magic: 27, then after that, Spellcasting: 27

• If you are humble and contented with being a god instead of a super-duper omega-god:
  • Get a second ULTIMATE spell, or train Spellcasting to 27.

Refer to this skilling order until the end of the game.

Melodious Screeching at the Edge of Reality (The Abyss)

If you ever wondered where the tentacles from Malign Gateway are coming from, I am sorry to say that I have no idea. But this place is probably a good first candidate.

As DCSS's only branch composed of infinite floors, you will be put to the test against a truly endless horde of industrially-manufactured creatures of all kinds, ranging from lost wizards who mispronounced a word during their incantations to unholy incarnations of disease, deformity and existential dread. The threat here is posed less so by the appearance of individual hyper-powered professional HP bar deleters, but rather by the constant swarm slowly whittling away most characters' vitality and magical reserves.

But as you know already by now, you are not "most characters". With the assistance of Jiyva, your body is an eternal blueprint, forever deconstructed and reconstructed to the whim of the slimy parasites slowly dissolving you into ooze. With immense HP and MP regeneration, all challenge in this branch will be mostly trivialized, safe from a few particularly dastardly encounters.

Begin your safari trip by heading into the gate found somewhere in Vaults. You can use "Ctrl-F" and search for "Abyss" to quickly travel to it. Enter, and see yourself dropped somewhere across the endless expanse of Abyss:1. Unless you were banished at some point earlier and your run, and managed to survive - in which case you may start on a deeper layer.

You mustn't stay on the first layer for long. Immediately begin walking, preferably in diagonal directions. Each tile revealed has a chance of containing a purple gate to the next Abyssal layer. Of course, just because you're actively trying to go deeper, the game will spawn a million pink exits. Ignore them, leaving them for the poor Minotaur Berserkers of this world that just got banished at level 8 by Erolcha.

The various denizens of this plane won't be exactly happy to see you, so much that the fabric of spacetime may occasionally drop a few goons right on your scruff. Fight paradoxes with paradoxes, using Manifold Assault to continuously clear the way like an explorer cutting ivies in a thick jungle. You will want to especially prioritize Starcursed masses, Wretched stars and Neqoxecs, so much that it may even be beneficial to use your Blinkbolt to ensure the pixels composing their bodies stain your screen for as little time as possible. Let us have a closer look at the most threatening creatures you may encounter wandering across the non-euclidean sea.

• Starcursed masses have a knack for choir signing, but their application for church service was denied on account of them being an eldritch horror. Instead, they will be delighted to practice their tunes on you. Every turn, Masses will attempt to clone themselves, and the more Masses there are on the screen, the more the danger level increases. You should seriously start to worry when 5 or more have accumulated, in which case you will be smited every turn, and perhaps even be paralyzed with zero option of a Willpower save. If Manifold Assault does not eliminate them quickly, Blinkbolt to them, and delete as many as possible with your cleaving paw-strikes.
• Lurking horrors have only one purpose in life - to explode your HP bar with Torment and to immediately commit suicide afterwards. If you decide to put them out of their misery, they will do things the other way around, dying and then exploding your HP bar. There really is no way around this - you will have to endure their blast if you see them on your screen, it's just a matter of when. Torment will never kill you, but other happy denizens around will be more than happy to finish what was started. Do not hit them until you are ready to endure some pain.
• Wretched stars are Lugonu's answer to you cheesing the Abyss with your boatloads of regeneration. Instead of whittling down your HP, these prefer to flash like a disco ball every second and slowly distort your perfect fuzzy body into something indistinguishable from the horrors roaming this plane. The temporary mutations they inflict upon you are ephemeral, and your feline perfection will be restored the moment you have slain a few critters - but there are a variety of very unpleasant things you can be cursed with. You should especially be wary of having your Strength score reduced to zero due to the Weakness mutation, which may take away up to 4 points in one fell swoop. Losing all Strength will cause instant paralysis. If you have 4 Strength or less, browse your jewelry collection for potential steroid-bands to wrap around your legs before engaging in Abyssal combat.
• Neqoxecs (and rarely, Cacodemons): These two demons, annoyingly notorious for dooming runs by looking into your eyes and instantly making you illiterate, are laughably trivialized by the One True Gooey God. Any bad mutations you may collect will eventually be wiped off your genome, but you should still treat this biochemical terror duo like you treat Wretched stars - capable of inflicting Strength penalties, as well as instantly dangerous afflictions such as random berserk on every hit. Yes, Manifold Assault can trigger berserkitis. There is a spell in this game that can make you go berserk. Trog is conflicted.

Descend to Abyss:2, then Abyss:3. Then, while still prioritizing diagonal movement, stop looking for Abyssal gates, and begin your search for the elusive Runelight - a beacon of hope across this horror-swept wasteland. You should avoid pursuing your descent into Abyss:4 and onwards, but random rips in the fabric of reality may occasionally force you deeper down Lugonu's funhouse. Console yourself through the fact that finding the rune is much easier in lower layers, but try your best to prevent further plunges. Abyss:7 is so brutal even a divine 15-rune feline (which you should become soon enough) would be challenged by the endless swarm.

You will eventually be notified with the message "You detect the abyssal rune!" Do not worry, the game makes it extremely hard to miss. At this moment, immediately look at your map. There will be a tiny one-tile spot somewhere, containing your objective - the Abyssal rune.

Carefully approach it, paying particular attention to strangely ordered architecture or death traps that could have only been designed by a developer's hand. If no entrance is in sight, circle around the perimeter until you discover something that looks like a proper door. Barge into the vault, Manifold Assaulting all potential resistance. Once the rune is seized, the Abyss will have been truly domesticated, and will beg for you to leave as quickly as possible. Exit through any of the pink gates that should start appearing soon, and return to the familiar stability of walls and floors that do not cease to exist on a whim.

Now, it is time to truly begin the Extended Endgame. Tremble in fear!

No, that comment wasn't for you. It was for your enemies.

Addendum: Turning Friends against Former Friends

If you were training for Death's Door or Borgnjor's Revification, you will probably have accumulated a nice collection of Necromancy skillpoints. If you have the spell slots (feel free to use Scrolls of Amnesia on all your now-irrelevant spells if you do not, like basic Summonings), I suggest learning the spell Death Channel.

Like your Form and Wereblood, it is another buff you can stick onto your macro and have active before every battle. Its effect is simple: instead of letting the innocent souls of demons voyage into the afterlife to meet their eldritch horror grandparents, you will force the essences of their being to stay behind and cause suffering to their former friends and coworkers. Most importantly, they will absorb the deadly damnation blasts that are getting thrown around everywhere like it's a game of Demon Dodgeball.

Are you feeling virtuous and chivalrous yet?

Bind it to the key you use to transform. Your macro should start to look like "zazhzj" or something like that, depending on what letters you attribute to your spells.

If you are training for Dragon's Call, you might not have Necromancy training, but instead of adding Death Channel to your repertoire, consider adding Dragon's Call to your Form + Wereblood macro instead. It's a status effect, and you should always have it up every time you go down a new staircase. Use something like "zazhzj", and never forget to use it ever again!

Abandon All Cat Treats All Ye Who Enter Here (Hell)

Judging by this place's name, I suppose you can expect colourful flowers, fluffy bunnies and a handful of ducklings following their moms on crystalline blue water ponds.

As demons are fully aware you only have murder and suffering on your mind, though, they will do everything in their power to stop you from genociding every form of life known to human, draconian, orc, elf, (...) kind. Who is really the bad guy?

Expect a cybernetically enhanced version of Vaults:5. Instead of locking out exits, though, the denizens of Hell will instead try to lock out your right to being alive.

You will first see Geryon, who is, all things considered, quite the pushover. You should instead be scared of the endless tides of demonic forces rushing to annihilate you from all sides. The single most dangerous thing you can do here is grow an ego and start walking away from the exits to o-tab/Blinkbolt some poor sod who dared breathe the same air as you. Soon, the GANG will arrive to avenge their fallen friend, and they pack quite the firepower.

Remain on the entrance, distributing a round of Manifold Assault to all contenders willing to test their mettle. As soon as you are out of MP/your HP has dropped below 66%, retreat upwards, mow down followers, and continue the stairdancing process. This part of the game is laughably easy if you have self-control, but the moment greed goes to your head, you run the very real risk of perishing. If Gozag's propaganda about "risky investments" and "maximizing profit" brainwashed you, it's time to re-educate yourself now.

Spread eerie silence across the entirety of the Vestibule of Hell, and have its four mini-branches revealed to you:

• The tranquil art gallery of Tartarus. Its element is darkness.
• The calm sauna-spa hotel of Gehenna. Its element is fire.
• The peaceful skiing resort of Cocytus. Its element is ice.
• And the quaint village of Dis. Its element is felid HP bar annihilation.

In my personal opinion (which should be irrefutable fact to you), the difficulty order of these branches, from easiest to hardest, is as follows: Tartarus -> Gehenna -> Cocytus -> Dis.

Strap on your finest rN+ gear (just a single + is enough if you have a usable (<10%) Death's Door, otherwise, rN++ is strongly advised), cast your Form and associated buffs (Dragon's Call, Wereblood & Death Channel, depending on which ones you have available) and plunge into Tartarus.

The first thing you may notice is an ominous message being printed in the message log. This will not always happen, but it has a chance to occur every single time you use a downwards staircase in any branch of Hell. "Hell effects", as they are unceremoniously called, have a variety of effects, most of which you could not care less about. Draining is one of them, and is often the subject of complaints from veteran players, but in your case, going from 130 HP to 100 is a lot less significant than some ugly Ogre player having their fat belly go on an instant diet of -80 maximum HP. What you should really watch out for is Strength drain.

Do not, EVER, go down a staircase in Hell if your Strength score is 3 or less.

This rule is still not foolproof. There are some edge cases where you will still be drained to zero from 5 or 6, but at that point, you are just cursed with bad luck and probably upset the cosmic order in some fashion. Trying to stay above 3 Strength balances safety with sanity, ensuring you aren't destroying your entire set of resistances and spells by equipping boring +6 Strength rings, and preventing most mishaps and pranks of RNGesus. If you need to juice out extra Strength, browse through your available rings, prefering those with more interesting properties.

And now, let us begin our exploration of Hell into the realm that started the entire practice of Necromancy. Judging by how infuriating it is to have the useless Book of Necromancy take up a slot in your Gozag bookstore, I'd say they're due for some crusading.

Endless Torment, How Banal (Tartarus)

The popcorn factories of the Crypts better buckle up, because they have competition here. Prepare to tab through hundreds of assorted little green spectral things that won't ever do a single point of damage to you. I advise starting with this Hell branch, because EV here is actually a huge help (unlike the other 3 realms) and the only real threat is getting multitormented by an assortment of edgy goth demons, which won't ever kill you anyways. Additionally, not having Death's Door is not as punishing here, as there are much lower levels of undodgeable burst damage, and the final boss, Ereshkigal, likes to cast Silence, which makes an emergency Death's Door much less reliable. This is therefore a great place to work off the last few percent points of failure on your Death's Door, or your Dragon's Call.

No, that Will/2 status effect isn't due to some bad mutation you forgot to remove. All Hell branches have a unique hostile atmosphere, which grants a permanent debuff as long as you remain in the realm. In this case, Tartarus smells as bad as a DCSS player's armpits and will constantly weaken your normally unbreakable feline self-confidence.

If you are replacing Storm Form with Statue Form, you'll find the natural rN+ and the partial torment protection to be very valuable here. If you have Storm Form, though, I don't recommend swapping Forms - twoshot-anything damage and blinkbolting is pretty much impossible to compete with.

Sometimes, the grisly black makeup everyone in this place wears isn't just for show. You should be particularly wary of:

• Silent spectres: In terms of damage, they are so weak they might as well be giving you comfort scritches. You will, however, "hear" them long before you see them. Constantly muffling all sound around their presence in a ridiculous range that goes through walls, they will restrict all use of spells or scrolls. Cast your buffs before entering a Silence aura, then look for them as fast as possible before you run out of lightning juice. They are also the reason why you should transform before going down any staircase in Tartarus - if one is camping the downstairs right below you, you will be happy about not having 3 AC while a dozen reapers are filming a cooking show with you as their main guest.

• Tzitzimimeh: These impossible-to-spell demons do love inflicting a Negative HP Syndrome or two. Their toolkit has everything they need to take you down on their own, with a triple-torment followed by a devastating beam of ice or negative energy. Most of the time, they are pushovers, as they won't actually be using their spells in the correct order, but the one case where one will can be extremely dangerous. If you gathered up sufficient rN+, they will be significantly trivialized.

• Tainted leviathans: These have a bad case of body odour, probably from streaking DCSS 15-rune games all day. Mercifully, Storm Form and Statue Form lack a sense of smell and are thus immune to their miasma aura. Instead, you should fear their large rocks, which they will throw like the aforementioned streakers throw their keyboards after splatting their 100th Troll Berserker. Be prepared to have a lot of red pixels on your screen if one projectile somehow gets past your massive EV score. You can usually Manifold Assault them to death before they throw a second one, but be mindful of their Mesmerisation. They usually die way too fast for it to matter, but sometimes, you can be double-mesmerized and feel like a cat trapped in a 3-tile pet box, in which case you should read a Scroll of fog/Scroll of summon butterflies if you are out of MP and need to regenerate for the extra cast of Manifold Assault that will liberate you.

• Doom hounds: I addressed these previously when talking about Grunn in my 3-rune guide, but Tartarus is their natural habitat. Not even taking advantage of your reduced Willpower, their Howl hex is as irresistible as ever, and their hatred for the feline kind just as intense. If you are not in a position to handle ~8 dangerous Tartarus enemies spawning right besides you for the next few turns, quaff a potion of cancellation to remove the Howl status effect - otherwise, feel free to tab through the fools they will summon, which are, oddly enough, worth experience.

Finally, you should be mindful that a reaper isn't slapping you with reach attacks for 10 turns in a row while you are taking down someone else. FeSu's best defense is taking out things really fast with immense damage, but letting things linger on your screen is asking to die. Running away in the Extended Endgame is a lot less effective than it was in the early dungeon. When in doubt, just kill them. If you attack a Tzitzimimeh and half your HP bar is gone in the first turn, do not suddenly decide "oh no I need to get out!!" and begin walking away only to get blasted by bolts every turn. Tab them. And if you really want to escape, use real methods like Scrolls of Blinking, Passage of Golubria, or Death's Door/Borgnjor's Revivification if that's starting to come online. This is true for EVERYTHING in the Extended Endgame.

In Tartarus, you will also occasionally discover some seemingly laughably weak monsters, such as a few Unseen horrors hopping about pathetically.

Do not be fooled. They are the most dangerous foes in this branch - for they alone have the power of stripping you of the rHubris resistance, and ensuring your ego peaks beyond the stratosphere only to smash you the next turn with a triple-torment wombo combo. Give them the most cold-hearted stare you can muster, plow them into the ground, and continue your rampage without ever letting down your guard.

In any branch of Hell, you can discover special vaults. For example, in my experience, there's one particular floor with only giants of various kinds that tends to spawn in one of the Hells every single game. There is also a high chance of an "ambush" floor at some point, where you'll go down a staircase and find yourself in Vaults:5 Redux. Ideally, you will encounter these dangerous gauntlets after Death's Door is online, but if you are unlucky enough to fall straight in the Tartarus variant while you are still a ways away from achieving on-demand invincibility, it's time to use every tool you have. I don't really advise trying to stairdance it - not only is it super dangerous to just stick in the centre, you will also be struck with Hell curses every single time you return to the ambush floor, thus weakening you further. Instead, use Blinkbolt or a Scroll of blinking to reposition on an edge, which will already conceal half of the enemies, and build yourself a fort out of summons, Scrolls of fog, Scrolls of summoning and buff up with Haste/Might/Brilliance. Worst case scenario, you die. Big deal.

If you get shafted in Tartarus, or any Hell branch, consider it a free skip and do not intentionally try to come back to the floors you missed.

Final Dastardly Trial

At the very bottom of Tartarus, on the seventh floor, you will find a specially constructed floor much bigger than everything you have cleared thus far. It is fairly standard, containing all the enemies you have seen thus far, but with the dreaded Ereshkigal, Queen of Tartarus, guarding the Bone Rune somewhere. If you want to know where, read a scroll of Magic Mapping - the part of the level that looks really epic is where she is. Do not burn indiscriminately through your scrolls of Magic Mapping - you want to keep at least 2 for the Tomb. Extras can be used as you please.

On one of the 4 final Hell floors, you will find the Serpent of Hell - you may meet it in Tartarus now, or much later. It always comes in a different ice cream flavour relevant to the branch - but don't worry, even if you encounter the licorice version in Tartarus, he's a pushover no matter what and can be tabbed through with ease.

Ereshkigal (who has the coolest sprite in the game) can be taken down in a variety of ways. First, you should be extremely cautious of her Paralysis ability, which will easily cut through your willpower thanks to the previously mentioned noxious atmosphere of her realm. Try to whip out a few summons or butterflies blocking line of fire to avoid this (I really like Malign Gateway here)! After that, you can charge up Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling if you have it, cast Enfeeble, or buff up with Haste and Might and spam Manifold Assault. She might eventually start radiating a Silence aura, in which case that is your call to walk/blinkbolt up to her and finish her off in honourable melee combat - if she isn't surrounded in minions, you are very likely to win even if you get paralyzed. If you get to low HP while fighting, do NOT start quaffing Potions of Heal Wounds. It will accomplish absolutely nothing. If she is also almost dead but also radiating Silence, take the plunge and continue melee attacking. You can also try to Blinkbolt away to an ally/curious enemy spectating the battle, which will still work while silenced.

After you have acquired Ereshkigal's suggestively-shaped Bone Rune, it is time to turn the heat up, and travel to Gehenna. As expected, replace your rN+ gear with rF+ gear, and cast all your self-buff spells before descending. If you were working on Death's Door, it should start to look reliable now - perhaps only with the aid of a wizardry bonus, or perhaps not.

On The Menu: Well Done Feline Cutlets (Gehenna)

The special effect of this branch is permanent -Scroll. Whipping out any piece of paper here would cause it to spontaneously combust, so you can say goodbye to your Scrolls of Blinking for the next seven floors. Considering your HP bar is also basically a piece of paper, I'd be worried if I were you.

You will probably be greeted first by the devoted artillerists of Gehenna: hell hogs and balrugs, among others. Almost everything in this branch uses the same strategy: take a big ball of fire, and throw it in your face. Many of these completely ignore your EV score, hence the importance of fire resistance. You can also optionally assume Dragon Form instead of Storm Form for the purposes of clearing this branch, as the fire resistance and extra health it grants here is much more useful defensively than the extreme EV of Storm Form. However, I personally don't bother and just beat the entire game with only Storm Form, because I am addicted to blinkbolting and it gives me dopamine every time I see the animation. It's your call.

If you possess a usable Death's Door, you should generally use it the moment you are below 40% HP. Other species usually try to wait for a truly dire emergency, but the stakes are different for a scion of the feline dynasty: you can be oneshotted with some very unlucky rolls from a relatively high HP threshold, but should you mess up your Death's Door play, you will be able to respawn.

Begin by... do I even need to say it at this point? If you see a non-ridiculous quantity of enemies, press the Manifold Assault button until everything perishes. Do so for every single thing you encounter here.

Here are some of the critters you should be watching out for:

• Searing wretches are the only creatures here without a ranged attack. They make up for it, of course, by having a ridiculous 90 damage melee attack that removes your fire resistance and invites the fireballs being fired all over the place to converge in your general direction and oneshot you. Do not let these things touch you if ranged enemies are on the screen. If they are alone, you can attempt a melee duel, but be ready to use something as pathetic as a level 2 Blink spell to escape their rough scritches. The best case scenario, of course, is to Manifold Assault them into a puddle of sputtering lava.

• Brimstone Fiends exhibit total disregard for Gehenna's theme - they do not have a single way of inflicting fire damage, and prefer instead to inflict felid-destroying damage through Torment (cuts your HP bar in half) and Damnation (blows up your HP bar, ignores EV). These need to die FAST. Do not hesitate to Blinkbolt to take them down before anything else. Unlike hellions, their Damnation attack is not smite-targeted, so hiding behind Death Channel spectres/summons will have them stand above you in the murder list.

• Balrugs have smiting in addition to the classical BBQ talents everybody in this branch shares, and while you are lightyears away from the terror of orc priests, a little irresistible 17 damage push is sometimes all it takes to tip you over the edge. Be mindful that they do not instantly kill you with this on the same turn as your Death's Door expires!

Other enemies are fairly unthreatening, at least not to an envoy of mitten-pawed greatness. Stokers and their associated Creeping inferno friends are extremely weak to Manifold Assault, but slaying the latter when they are in close proximity to you does tend to unleash a titanic blast that, while impressive, will not actually explode your HP bar for once.

Final Fiery Trial

At the very bottom of Gehenna, you'll uncover the titanic fortress of Asmodeus. This is probably one of the most visually impressive areas of the game - a shame you won't be able to see it fully with a Scroll of magic mapping. Certain layouts have a large quantity of demons cackling at you behind iron bars and occasionally shooting out a smite or two. They seem to have forgotten that being enclosed in a normally inaccessible space... does nothing to limit a master of spacebending such as yourself. I won't even name the spell you should use to solve this problem - you know it already.

Asmodeus himself, despite all the decorations and ribbons, is actually quite the pushover. The moment you spot him, you can immediately begin your frenzy of melee attacks, both of the geometrically impossible and standard type. Or, you can use Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling and Alt-F4 him (though this method is WEAK and I will deduct your bonus points). Enfeeble will similarly turn him into a D:1 appropriate enemy, which will also deduct your bonus points.

The only moment things get spicy is when he panics, dials up 911 and summons a batch of felid extermination specialists. You will still want to finish him off if his lifebar is running low in this case, but Yara's Violent Unravelling is a strong argument should his summoned Brimstone Fiends decide to cause trouble.

Once the Obsidian rune has found its rightful place in your scruff-bag (again, where do you hide all this stuff??), I invite you to depart from the Hells for now. The other two realms are much, much harder, and require a little bit more preparation, and preferably a very, very reliable Death's Door.

Interdimensional Treasure Hunt in the Popcorn Factory (Pandemonium)

I'm not the biggest fan of this place. It has a little bit of everything, and will test every single one of your resistances, but most importantly, it will test your rHubris.

The entire principle of Pandemonium is to throw megatons after megatons of popcorn. You will beg for it to stop, but your prayers will go unanswered, and you will continue stuffing your face in popcorn. And when that dastardly boredom sets in, that o-tabbing trance... that's when they whip out Catslayer the Pandemonium Lord with Glaciate, Silence & Blinkbolt.

In Pandemonium, there are rune realms, and there are random realms. You know a realm is a rune realm, as there will be a special message mentioning the presence of a rune whenever you take one of the hexagonal portals. If you end up in a runeless realm, do not tarry. As soon as you spot a hexagonal portal, plunge into it onto the next world, until you land in a place containing a rune. Every moment you pass exploring random realms is a moment you are playing cards with RNGesus, and I wouldn't exactly trust your chances against the lord of randomness itself. All it takes is one nasty vault, or one horrendously crafted Panlord spell set, and there goes a life. Or your run.

You may attempt to battle Pandemonium Lords, but always inspect their spells first. You should be extremely cautious of Chain Lightning (yes, even though you have rElec), Damnation in all flavours, Silence, Blinkbolt and especially Glaciate. This last one is murder in a box, and your only salvation will be either having maximum cold resistance, or eliminating the threat as soon as possible with Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling. Enfeeble also works, and may reduce Panlords to bumbling fools not so distinguishable from glorified quokkas.

You can laugh at all flavours of Summon Eyeballs - their "allies" will immediately recognize you as the envoy of the One True Gooey god, and turn against them for an easy kill. If the message log gets spammed with "omg omg are you sure you want to attack gooey friend???" on the same turn they are spawned, do not worry - do anything else than attacking for a turn, perhaps sipping on some refreshment potions, and the next turn, you will have been recognized as an Awesome Individual, completing the eyes' betrayal.

I did say that Pandemonium had a good place in the popcorn factory stock market, but the various flavours of demonspawn you may encounter here are determined to enforce area security, and prevent you from damaging the popcorn merchandise. Be wary of:

• Demonspawn blood saints: If the name wasn't already intimidating enough, try the name of their main spell: Legendary Destruction. Simply put, this is an undodgeable mega-fireball-iceball-deathball-antifelidball designed to murder you. Having a + in all resistances will help, and your Death Channel ghost slaves friends will be glad to block a few. However, your prime directive is to delete these off the board as fast as possible. Which may be difficult, considering they tend to travel with...

• Demonspawn warmongers: They can point at you and declare "Could you stop bending reality for one minute?" and strip you of all spells for 3 to 5 turns. You will always get to cast a spell of your choice before the effect kicks in, not that you'll be able to use this opportunity wisely, for you are too busy spamming Manifold Assault. It certainly won't stop your Blinkbolt, though, so feel free to engage and sow destruction mano-a-mano.

Here are the realms you are looking for:

Mnoleg, Demon Lord of Chaos

Hold onto your Geiger counters! I say to not linger in random Pandemonium realms, but this is especially true here - this place is filled to the brim with malmutators of all flavours, and just having its denizens look in your general direction is sufficient to have your DNA go through the entire history of genetic medicine.

As soon as you arrive, read a scroll of Magic Mapping. There will be a part of the level that looks cool and badass, as opposed to the random array of chambers composing the rest of the level - travel towards it immediately! It can look like a cross, or like a zig-zag pattern - there's a bunch of possible layouts. Within, you will find Mnoleg.

They're a complete pushover. They even have a laughable "Summon Eyeballs" ability that will turn against them every single time they use it (though eyes take 1 turn to be pacified - remember, if your message log gets spammed, just wait one turn doing anything else than your usual pummelling, then resume your slaughter!)

Blinkbolt to them, and tab them to death. Some builds have a lot of trouble with Mnoleg, but for you, it's a walking Potion of Experience.

Claim the Glowing Rune, located near Mnoleg themselves. Once it has found its rightful place in your pockets, I would advise escaping the area as soon as possible to avoid further exposure to the radioactive fallout! If the exits are far away, feel free to read a Scroll of Teleportation or two to inch yourself closer.

Lom Lobon, Demon Lord of Forbidden Knowledge

Now THIS one is fun!

You've gotten used to it by now - popcorn, popcorn and more popcorn scattered liberally across the entire realm. It's like these demons were never taught proper table manners. If you somehow run into a single close call slaying Lom Lobon's dozens of wizardly visitors, you should perhaps consider opening your eyes. Or using the keyboard with your hands instead of your feet.

The Lord that presides over this place, however, that all these wizards are seeking out - it's a tough cookie.

They possess:

• A death cyclone that obliterates everything around them in a radius covering the whole screen
• A mega self-heal that completely negates half the blows you've been struggling to dispense thus far
• Glaciate, the most overpowered Pandemonium Lord ability
• Blink Range, to escape you right when you were about to claim victory, only for them to heal out of sight (yes, they are allowed to do that) and return

They also have a marble collection of Ball Lightnings that they like to show you from time to time, but those are quite laughable with Storm Form's rElec. I think it's just them being a good sport.

Of course, if you value victory over fun (perhaps these things are synonymous to you?), the easiest way is to use Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling. Notice Lom, delete Lom. As anticlimactic as that.

If you have taste and value your time playing video games, you can use the lesser point-and-click "I deem you insignificant!" that is Enfeeble, which will massively place the odds in your favour. Naturally, though, the one true way to defeat Lom Lobon is through an honourable and tense boss battle. Buff up with Haste/Might/Brilliance, you will need them. Take things one turn at a time, always trying to stay very far away from Lom Lobon as you dish out Manifold Assaults. Whenever their Tornado starts to swell up, you do not want to be caught in it. It's strongly recommended to have the Blink spell to reposition in emergencies - staying inside their Glaciate aftermath will still hurt, and so will taking many turns being thrown about by the raging winds. Of course, Death's Door for a finisher will work incredibly, but trying to use allies and summons like Dragon's Call will be extremely difficult. Your blinkbolt can be used once or twice in the fight to sneak in those finishing blows, but keep in mind that they will resist it fully, and can very well blink away the next second or blast you with Glaciate and Tornado as you are in close range!

If you defeated Lom Lobon correctly, salute this worthy opponent with a honourable meow ("t"-"t"). This will also have the effect of bringing out the Titan occasionally camping the Magical Rune, waiting for you to go in exhausted, thinking you have won, only to blast you with Airstrike and rocket you back to the title screen. Devilish! Please be careful, and do not immediately rush to grab the rune if the battle left you at very low HP.

Cerebov, Demon Lord of Fire and Steel

Ah, another real challenge.

Welcome to Gehenna 2 Redux. With a nice new coat of red paint. They even stole some of the Gehenna employees to really push forward that "we didn't have enough fire-themed levels" vibe. Just like the original place that led to this bootleg, preferably equip rF++, though a single + can do if you have Death's Door.

You will encounter the same old Brimstone Fiends and Balrugs strolling about. Refer to the Gehenna portion of this guide to be reminded of the dangers they pose.

Contrary to Asmodeus, however, the lord of this place has been hitting the gym. They enjoy outdoors activities like rifle shooting with Iron Shot, but will get frustrated easily after you'll have dodged each one with your 55 EV. Instead, they will grumble and resort to conjuring forth undodgeable Fire Storms from the sky. These hurt.

Their "death combo" usually goes as follows - you get a big ego, you Blinkbolt in their face, they sneak in a hit with their fire resistance-stripping sword, then blast 3/4 of your HP bar as you have zero rF remaining. Do NOT Blinkbolt Cerebov when they are at full health. Just like Lom Lobon, start out far away, and then only go into close quarters to secure the kill. Death's Door is an immense help here - it's very likely you'll be able to take them down in the entire duration. You can use Yara's Violent Unravelling to remove their Haste self-buff, which has a nasty tendency of making their pillars of celestial flame appear a little bit too often.

Yes yes, Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling and Enfeeble. Do you want your bonus points? Do you want to be able to say "I melee'd Cerebov as a Felid!!"? No? Fine then. Use them. Psh.

The Fiery Rune will be uncovered following your victory, to be used as a paw-warmer sack for your imminent descent into Cocytus.

Gloorx Vloq, Demon Lord of Darkness

Another Lord of Popcorn, this time always located in a very claustrophobic checkerboard pattern. The only way you'll run into trouble before challenging the boss here is through the elusive Curse Skull triple-torment into an Executioner swarm. This is extremely unlikely to happen, therefore, do not fear holding down Tab for most of this realm.

Trying to melee Gloorx Vloq to death is doable, but extremely dependent on if they spend their turns spamming Poison Arrows to tickle you with or annihilating your will to live with Symbol of Torment and assorted Executioner friends. I strongly recommend having Death's Door if you plan to do some arm-and-paw wrestling with this overgrown spider-person! If you do not have that spell, you will need to buff up with Haste/Might. Otherwise, this Pandemonium Lord is not as trivial as Mnoleg, but certainly nowhere near as much of a threat as Lom & Cerebov.

Of course, Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling and Enfeeble are things that exist. If you use these weapons of mass destruction, however, did you truly win?

The Dark Rune is hidden somewhere across the checkerboard. Don't miss it! Spamming "o" (autoexplore) will eventually uncover it, ripe for grabbing.

DCSS Developer, Demon Lord of Pure Evil

The demonic rune tends to be either the easiest, or the hardest. It can actually spawn at random in a supposedly runeless realm, but don't let that be an excuse to explore. Eventually, the demonic rune will be properly announced, and you will be invited to partake in one of many specially designed death trap vaults. Of course, if you randomly found the rune lying around, you won't have to bother.

Holy Pandemonium is the most famous. The Shining One decided its angels were due for a vacation, but sent them all to a realm of unbound suffering and agony instead. They are understandably pissed, but as they can't really question the big man upstairs, they will entertain their painful existence by playing a game of Smite the Cat.

Feel free to read a scroll of magic mapping, though remember, keep at least 2 for the Tomb. You want to go in the massive epic castle at the centre, defeat the Seraph within (he's a pushover!), grab the rune, then escape through the portals located in the lower left corner.

Do NOT go into the little Zin shrine at the top right. It is FULL of smites. It's like the Orc Priest meetup. You can literally poke your muzzle in and die in 3 turns. The Elyvilon garden at the very bottom, however, is perfectly safe and can even net you a few extra potions of Heal Wounds, which you will probably chug when it's least appropriate to do so and die instead of using your Blink spell. I never do that, haha...

Hellion Island is the most infamous. They didn't aim for spectacle with this one - 5x5 space lost in a normal Pandemonium level, full of hellions, rune at the centre. For obvious reasons, charging in - or worse, Blinkbolting in - is suicide. This is usually evident, but sometimes, the popcorn frenzy gets to you. If you see a hellion standing behind lava in a Demonic Rune realm, do NOT blinkbolt. Manifold Assault each hellion one by one, keeping them at the edge of line-of-sight. When each one has been deleted, feel free to claim your prize.

Disco Pan is snazzy! It's usually not that threatening, unless you spawn inside of it, in which case you should engage prime GTFO directive with a Scroll of teleportation, and attempt as best as you can to survive the couple of turns required for it to kick in. Approaching it normally will let you funnel the many demons within through a narrow hallway. When the conga line has finished feeding your skill screen with juicy EXP, enter and witness an extremely alluring disco ball which, sadly, you cannot pick up, and you will be forced to make do with a lousy rune instead. Offensive to all felines of this world!

Hallway of Smites is exactly what it says on the tin. Big corridor, iron bars and tons and tons of smoke demons on both sides with the occasional hellion. This really is just Hellion Island 2.0 - puny conjurers may fear it if they lack spells capable of hitting the entire screen, but you could not care less, for feeble material barriers have never stopped your repeated violations of spacetime. Take it one step at a time, remove each smiter from existence one by one, and finally traverse the hallway, claiming the rune available within.

Tremendous Tundra Terror (Cocytus)

Naturally, coming in here with zero Cold Resistance is very, very ill-advised. Fix this before opening the gates to this luxurious skiing resort. Hot chocolate awaits you at the bottom, I promise! To ensure you keep your thirst, all use of potions has been strictly forbidden.

I'm not even going to bother listing dangerous enemies this time around, because there really is just one. Wow, Ice Fiends have Torment and an ice attack! That's so creative, I sure wasn't expecting every branch in a place named Hell to have an ability to torment me! Incredible, Shard shrikes with a very-easy-to-dodge missile that will two shot you if you don't!! That's so cool, I've never seen that before, and certainly not in the last 7 hours back when I had to dodge poison darts in D:1!!! There are also Narguns, which are some of the most miserable and piteous creatures to ever stain the face of Hell. They are lacking in Flight despite living in a water-stream-torn realm, and their only real ability is a ranged Petrify that you will be 100% immune to. Even if you weren't, feline willpower will very likely drop the trigger chance to a laughable 1% or 0%. Heartlessly delete them, they don't even have feelings. Many of these enemies can cause trouble for certain characters, but you are not a "certain character", you are a 15-rune Felid.

Now, wendigos, on the other hand.

Their first spell is quite simple. Shoot electricity beam, do laughable damage to you, but also irresistibly paralyze you for 1 turn if you somehow fail to dodge it with your 9999 EV. They will usually use that turn to pelt you with their other spell, but frankly, they don't need it. Most of the time, they will just look at you and unleash the icy wrath of Seracfall upon your frail form.

Seracfall is an EV-ignoring, megadamage (99 maximum) 3x3 iceblast that partially ignores cold resistance (though having it is still important). Run from it, dread it, it arrives all the same - and will make you reach for your Death's Door button in record time. The twist is that they can only use it if a Simulacrum is on the same screen as the Wendigo.

This makes Scrolls of Fog/Butterflies extremely precious in Cocytus. They both offer temporary protection against Seracfall in their own ways - valuable turns with which to use Manifold Assault and delete either the Simulacra, or the Wendigo before they can unite in a devastating combo.

Having permanent Flight though Storm Form makes Cocytus a lot easier. This is still one of the Hells I don't like to stick around in too long - I didn't mention Titans yet, which can occasionally squeeze in an undodgeable Airstrike which isn't any more pleasant. Be prepared to cast Death's Door on almost every floor, or, if you do not have it, to keep surrounding yourself in allies to block or partially negate the EV-ignores being thrown all over the place.

Final Icy Trial

Santa's wondrous factory awaits you at the bottom. Except it actually is Christmas at the time the game is taking place, and Santa needed a replacement to guard his belongings while he was away. This security guy is named Antaeus, and he's as much of a ripped gym-goer as the name evokes. In fact, it is the single entity with the highest HP in all of DCSS. To be precise, I'm quite certain you could cram 9 Felids in a trenchcoat, and then you'd have one Antaeus.

That doesn't mean he's hard, by the way. As long as you have decent rC, he does rather small damage at range compared to his acolytes, and has no particularly villainous spell like Ereshkigal does. This does not mean you should just blinkbolt in and bash the guy. Like I said, he has the physique to suplex a cat or two in melee. Invincible felines are out of his repertoire, however, so casting Death's Door and then just tabbing him to death has worked every single time I've tried it with no buffs whatsoever. Failing that, stacking Wereblood, then spamming Manifold Assault will also get the job done. And if you're uncool, Maxwell's Capacitative Coupling/Enfeeble also work. You dirty cheater.

The Icy Rune will be awarded following this anticlimactic finale, and guide you towards the final Hell that is the Iron City of Dis.

Did I say something about hot chocolate? Hmm. I don't remember ever mentioning such a thing. Move along.

Pleasant Gardens and Ecofriendly Urbanism in Tortureville (Iron City of Dis)

In order to promote peacefulness and discourage violence, the Dis Homeowners Association has elected to curse you with a permanent -8 to your AC and slaying. That won't actually matter - keep your Wereblood up to compensate, and have your Death's Door button at paw's reach.

What resistance should you equip for this branch, you ask? rHubris. Honestly, just go for the full damage with Intelligence (if buffs Storm Form's AC too!), unless you have really outstanding AC-boosting rings.

The nice thing about Dis is the large amount of iron grates, which Manifold Assault excels at squeezing past and tickling the prisoners stuck within thinking themselves funny with their damnation smites. That's about where the good things end. You will learn to fear:

• Quicksilver elementals - In addition to their prodigiously annoying movement (remniscent of D:1 bats), they occasionally shoot Storm Form-removing bolts (that can be dodged, but still) that will leave you as a negative AC kitty (actually negative because of the branch effect, not another one of my hyperboles), and ripe for a good old oneshotting. If you notice this the same turn as it happens, you can recast your transformation in relative safety, but these enemies are the main reason why you should not hold down Tab in Dis. If you get untransformed, you WILL perish extremely fast.
• Hell sentinels - The Brimstone Fiends from Gehenna but worse - instead of tormenting you, they will flat out play with fate with an extremely high damage Iron Shot that you will usually dodge... until you don't. They can also Hurl Damnation (not the smiting flavour, the throw-in-your-face & blocked-by-allies flavour). Make turning these evil robots into roombas your main priority. Immune to Blinkbolt's damage (though you can still use it to move towards them).
• Iron golems - Slow and deprived of any way to deal damage as long as you are not in melee range. However, they have three trillion AC, take decades to die and can do up to 100 damage with their hits. They are purely an ego check - they are so lethargic you could easily handle a hundred of these dudes by just kiting until the stars die, but that's harder to do when other bots are around. Immune to Blinkbolt's damage (though you can still use it to move towards them).
  • Iron giants have been appointed to solve the slowness issue of the aforementioned golems. Their toned biceps allow them to suplex 10 tons of steel, and hurl them at you in the style of the early unique Robin. You will find that a massive metal fist hurts a little bit more than a hobgoblin with a +0 dagger. Note that they have a big ego, and tend to show off by throwing the enemy that is furthest away from you. They also have a short range Iron Shot, just as nasty as the Hell Sentinels'.

If it wasn't obvious enough, all of these enemies have properties that are completely dependent on a simple rule: do not mindlessly Tab Dis. It's a very deceptive place, as it's easy to take out 8 iron golems at the same time with cleaving attacks, then get pulverized by a single one who just so happens to hit 3 millimeters closer to your constantly reshaping and dodging body. It's even easier to be untransformed at the worst moment, to eat an Iron Shot because you were tabbing towards a lonely Sentinel instead of using Manifold Assault, or to tab through a harmless Caustic shrike (three words I would have never thought of putting together) only to have a Golem thrown next to you the next second by an Iron Giant at the edge of your screen.

Death's Door makes this place so much easier. There's a ton of "dodge or suck" attacks, but as long as you remain in Storm Form, you will not be oneshotted, and will always have a turn to cast your Death's Door to mow down the opposition/retreat to the Hell gate. If you do not have it, Dis is really hardcore, and I strongly urge you to be cautious and manage your positioning so your potential allies from Death Channel or Dragon's Call are always standing in the way of devastating Iron Shots and Damnation blasts.

Final Robotic Trial

The metropolis of Dis:7 is labyrinthine. If you have at least 3 scrolls of Magic Mapping, you may read one to scout out the area. Honestly, I tend to rush the badass-looking fortress and ignore the suburbs. Dis really does play with your sense of safety in that you either take zero damage (most of the time) or have your HP bar exploded (rarely). But for each fight you get yourself into, the probability of the latter happening never ceases to increase. When I lose lives in the Extended Endgame, I usually lose them in Dis. Let that be your warning.

Dispater, mayor of Dis, awaits you in the cool looking town hall. They're big, bulky, and robotic, in the image of their citizens. I'm sure they're feeling very represented by this no-doubt democratically elected leader.

There's two very uncool spells you can use to completely trivialize the challenge. I won't even mention them, this time around. Pah!

If you're a good sport and accept Dispater's challenge, know that they have a big spear and are not afraid to use it. It's very easy to dodge, but can deal up to 110 damage. Honestly, this individual is kind of like Antaneus, but instead of being very tanky and only being really dangerous in melee, they're slightly tanky and dangerous up to 4 tiles away. In my experience, the same treatment of Death's Door > Blinkbolt > melee to death with no buffs works every single time. You can quaff Haste/Might if you really want a 100% chance of winning, though doping is generally frowned upon in wrestling matches. Just defeat Dispater in the same way you defeated Antaeus, but consider using your basic Blink or Passage of Golubria if they get too close and you do not have Death's Door.

After Hell's demonic screeching has been silenced, and its 4 stones have been added to your gemstone collection (in exchange for causing the suffering of hundreds of innocent demons - really, have you ever seen these guys outside of their branches? No? They were just chilling there!), you may proceed to the final branch of the game.

And my favourite, as well!

I Thought Cats Were Sacred In Egypt (Tomb)

This is it, my noble acolyte. The final rune. And certainly the hardest. That's a synonym for "most fun".

If you've been following my 3-rune guide, you should have already cleared out the outskirts of Tomb:1. Delving into the structure proper should be an easy task - there are some patrolling Royal mummies here and there, who will give you a taste of what is to come. There are multiple ways of dealing with them - you can, of course, use them as a remotely available scratching post with Manifold Assault, but if they start talking to you about their love for entomology, it's time to cast Silence, blinkbolt to engulf them in the aura, and begin whooping them while they do nothing except try to sneak in pathetically weak melee attacks.

Mummies can drain stats every time you slay them, which includes Strength. To avoid dissolving your muscles into the physique of a DCSS winstreaker, ensure, just like Hell, that you are always walking around with 4 Strength or more. If it's red, it's bad.

Like in your previous exploration of Tomb:1, it is strongly advised to not rely on teleportation scrolls for a safe getaway. Despite what your veterinarian-therapist may say, there ARE mummies living in your walls, and they CAN hurt you.

Once the temple has fallen eerily silent... do not immediately decent into Tomb:2. It is the third instalment of the epic Vaults:5 trilogy, a grand finale that will be delighted to end your run no matter how overpowered you (think you) are.

First, if you have at least 3 of each type of potion out of Haste, Might and Brilliance, sip on each one. Cast all your relevant self buffs - not Death Channel, it's useless, but your Storm Form & Wereblood are indispensable. A Dragon's Call, if you have it, is a huge help, and Leda's Liquefaction can negate a few extra hits.

There are two ways of clearing Tomb:2. The normal, sane way, and the EXPLOSIVE way. If you are like me and value detonating dessicated corpses more than your wellbeing, also quaff a potion of attraction before going down.

Then, descend.

The Sane Way

Immediately read a Scroll of Magic mapping.

Locate the upstairs, in one of the four diagonal directions. Use Passage of Golubria to approach it as quickly as possible. You can use more than one cast - you will already be standing on top of the gate on the second cast, and can just press ">" to teleport. Now you're thinking with portals! If you do not have that spell, Blinkbolt to an enemy in a way that would place you closer to salvation.

Rush the upstairs hatch. There is a non zero possibility a few scarabs will be snoozing on it - gently ask them to move with Dispersal/Disjunction, or, if politeness isn't your type, feel free to pummel them and smear their rotten hemolymph across the engraved walls.

When you are firmly standing on top, assess your options - if there is a dispersal trap nearby, you should be very, very scared. It is strongly advised here to ascend again immediately, lest you find yourself the main guest of an awkward translocational dance party. If there is no such trap, feel free to tab through the opposition who dare request you slide off their staircase, assuming your feline role of always putting your body in the most inconvenient locations possible.

Should your HP bar get melted away, throw in a Death's Door and ascend back up when the status becomes light gray. If you do not have Death's Door, it is recommended to ascend as soon as you hit the 50% HP mark.

Rince and repeat by taking the down-hatch again (without the buffs, unless the screen looked truly terrible), moving to the up-hatch, mowing down the stragglers and ascending again until Tomb:2 is as silent as the guards that once watched over Tomb:1.

The EXPLOSIVE Way (REQUIRES DEATH'S DOOR)

Now that's the spirit!

Due to your (highly charismatic) aura, mummies will immediately rush to pet you. They simply cannot wait for their turn and will climb all over each other in an attempt to reach you. Teach them some politness by executing the following actions:

• Cast Death's Door.
• Read a Scroll of magic mapping.
• Read a Scroll of immolation.
• Attack in melee until it happens.

There it is. The ultimate kaboom, the explosion to end all Guardian Golems. A fitting end for your run. You will take so much damage it could have oneshotted any character, but that doesn't matter, because you have ascended to godhood, and Death is just the buddy you come to see on Sunday evenings to play games and eat pizza. She'll let you off scot-free this time.

You may need to weave in a few extra attacks, but once everything has been clearly incinerated, there may be more guests coming along to witness the fireworks - invite them as very special guests, and feel free to read more Scrolls of immolation as long as your Death's Door is still white in the status effect bar. When it becomes gray, Passage of Golubria/Scroll of Blinking towards the stairs, yada yada. (If there are a lot of survivors, you might want to use a Potion of Cancellation first to remove the Attraction causing the mummy train to follow along your blinks - don't worry, it won't remove Death's Door). The next time you descend, the floor will be cleared of most threats, and safe to clean up with the same non-euclidean ear-scritching strategies you are familiar with.

Royal Mummy Meetup

Ascend again to Tomb:1, but this time, not with the hatch located in the centre of Tomb:2. Instead, use the other one, located in one of the small perimeter rooms.

This will lead you to the terrible death trap room that made teleportation scrolls so scary to use on Tomb:1. It is a long, winding hallway, filled to the brim with an full dynasty's worth of royal mummies. Thankfully, you will probably only battle against one or two at a time. There are multiple ways:

• You can Enfeeble them, Blinkbolt to them, then rip them to shreds of toilet paper as they are mumbling about. Cast Death's Door if they start to cackle creepily at you and spam Torment and Smite.

• You can Blinkbolt to them, cast Silence, then unroll their bandages until they crumble in an unrecognizable mass.

• You can Blinkbolt to them, begin immediately your death-scritches, and resort to Death's Door right away when you inevitably start to get absolutely demolished.

If you aren't Silenced, while I personally almost never use Jiyva's Invocations (something about kills not giving experience doesn't fit well with my genocidal life philosophy), in this particular area, they are extremely effective. Turn the entire hallway into acid goop with Oozemancy, or instantly teach the One True Gooey Word to a Royal Mummy heathen with Slimify!

I personally prefer the first method, but it does have the disadvantage that if some other mummy approaches the scene, it may decide to cheer on its friend by unrolling its arthropod friends and tormenting you. A Teleportation scroll will usually bring you out of trouble - if you have been in Death's Door for 5-7 turns, it's strongly recommended to read one at that moment!

Never hesitate to use a Potion of cancellation to remove your own Silence, if you use the second method.

If you happened to keep Yara's Violent Unravelling and a mummy was quick enough on the holster to whip out their scarabs and scorpions, you can also remote detonate each one and have them regret their life's passion for entomology.

At the end of this (usually tranquil) trial, you will find another down-hatch, leading to the next exhibit of the Tomb's guided tour. Some unsavoury individuals enjoy Shattering about the place and ruining the nice surprises the mummies worked so hard to set up for them, but we are gentlecats. We know when to appreciate a good obstacle course!

Down there is nothing too special. More of these small rectangular Tomb:2 rooms, infested with a variety of popcorn foes. If you ever feel threatened, the up-hatch is right there for your convenience. When Tomb:2 has been fully cleared out (for real this time), then it the true final battle may finally begin.

Grand Pharaoh Showdown (Tomb:3)

Honestly, this is always my favourite part of the run! Prepare to have your heart beat so fast Anubis will drop it while trying to weigh it.

If you plan to pick the "Last Stand" strategy below and have a pawful of Scrolls of amnesia, eliminate all irrelevant spells, and replace them with high level Summonings of all kinds, and also Necromutation (or Statue Form if Necromutation's failure rate is too high) as well as Animate Dead (and Infestation, but only in the unlikely situation where it is somehow castable).

In fact, even if you choose the "Boring Way", Animate Dead is strongly recommended if you can fit it into your strategy. Death Scarab Zombies are the best friend you could ever have. After Jiyva, that is. And me.

In all cases, Apportation, if you have room for it, will give way to a tiny little perk that may very well save your run - among the treasure hoards rests an inconspicuous Ziggurat Figurine, which, when evoked (like a wand), will summon a gateway to the Ziggurat under your paws. This is effectively a 2-turn access to a pocket dimension where you'll only find a single lackey or two guarding Zig:1, which you can promptly delete, and then rest inside the cozy chamber. When you return using the blue portal, your HP and MP reserves will have been fully replenished. Grasping the Figurine in the middle of the action can be difficult, which is why Apportation is recommended to yoink it.

Another good spell to slot into your strategy, if you have room, is Borgnjor's Revivification - a full HP heal that will permanently trim off 6-15 maximum HP points. A normally unacceptable downside, but made irrelevant by your imminent victory.

Treat this moment like entering Tomb:2, and buff up with Might/Haste/Brilliance first and foremost. Self-buffs like Wereblood, Animate Dead and Dragon's Call, if you have the latter, are also mandatory. Leda's Liquefaction is never a bad thing to have on hand, either.

Descend. Immediately read a scroll of Magic mapping.

Then, choose your path.

The Boring Way

If you only care about securing the win, this is the way to go. But honestly, I have no idea why you would do something as insane as bringing a Felid into extended only to then use the sanest, most reasonable tactics available. Anyhow, if you have zero lives remaining and feel uncomfortable, I won't be deducting your bonus points for choosing this, you've done your share of epic feats already.

Immediately scan the two treasure chambers on the left and right side of Tomb:3 by pressing "X". Try to ignore the fact that Tomb:3 layouts tend to be slightly remniscent of genitalia, and locate the side which does not have a dispersal trap. Yes, even Zot traps are better.

If they both have some, I advise trying to ascend back to Tomb:2 as soon as possible and picking one of the two other strategies instead.

Use Passage of Golubria to get as close as possible to the door to the treasure chamber you have chosen, and enter. If a guard has been tasked with protecting the exit, thank them for their help in your endeavours after Blinkbolting them. If pesky scarabs insist on challenging you to a game of King of the Hatch, indicate your disinterest with Dispersal or Disjunction.

Soon, the Squad will converge upon you, funnelled into the chamber via that tiny one-tile-door like cereal grains. And it will be your job to mow them down. If you still have a few summons, they can absolutely assist your endeavours - but otherwise, it is a matter of staying on that hatch, casting Manifold Assault, melee-cleaving all contenders coming to see you up close, and finally using Death's Door only to ascend, and repeat the process from the top, similarly to Tomb:2.

When the flow of mummies starts dying down, even if you haven't absolutely eradicated all trace of life (or rather, unlife), a Scroll of teleportation should bring you away from the warzone, and potentially closer to the rune, which is located at the back of Tomb:3.

The Last Stand (optimal if you do not have Death's Door)

Gather up your quokkas, dragons, reality-shattering tentacles and remote-delivered forests! If you choose this option, you choose to end this run by returning to your origins of blessed Summoner. Start with the same procedure as "The Boring Way" - that is, get inside the treasure room with the least amount of dispersal traps pronto!

However, this time, instead of directly going for the stairs, unload your entire swarm of summons all over the gold-covered floor, and cast your defensive Form - Necromutation if you have it online, Statue Form if you do not. Cast Animate Dead as well to turn all slain Death Scarabs into extremely powerful and numerous allies. As for proper Summonings, you'll probably want to use Dragon's Call, Malign Gateway, Summon Forest, Summon Horrible Things, Haunt, Monstrous Menagerie, Summon Cactus Giant and Summon Mana Viper - these are listed in order of efficiency.

As brave contenders approach the doorway in the vain hope of cutting their way through the tentacle jungle, cackle at the royal mummies who think themselves "summoners" by unleashing 3 scorpions only to then take hundreds of damage points in one turn from all the things scritching them at the same time. Laugh a little bit less when they use Abjuration. Stand behind your Gateway for cover, and bring back in the Squad. Scrolls of Summoning can provide additional temporary firepower!

Your reserves will be tested. You will want to constantly keep yourself healed up by sipping on Ambrosia potions, or perhaps even mass-chugging Curing cocktails. This is the end of the run - if you are not using Necromutation, suffer no liquor to remain un-tasted. If you are using lichform and need some emergency heals, feel free to use "End Transformation" from your (a)bility menu.

In this particular scenario, using the hatch is more of a last resort than a proper element of your strategy. Almost all of your summons (except the Gateway) will vanish should you escape with your tail between your legs - hence the reason why you should call back to your sabretooth origins, and stand your ground with all the courage you can muster until the situation is truly going sour! Your healthbar having a lot of red on it is not "sour". Having 17 HP or less when smiters (royal mummies or mummy priests) are on the screen, however, is "sour".

When your army finally triumphs, celebrate by letting them all go back to their respective planes of existence you so heartlessly kidnapped them from, and claim the treasure, including the Golden Rune!

The ULTRA-NUKE (requires at least 1 life and Death's Door)

This is, naturally, the most reckless and demented way to clear Tomb:3 out of the three methods suggested here. I am putting it here because I find it fun, not because it is optimal or will give you the highest chance of success. You have been warned!

The first step is to read a Scroll of Teleportation.

There are, generally, three different places you can end up in:

• The opposite end of Tomb, with the rune nearby.
  • In this case, you got very lucky, and can attempt to rush with Blinkbolt/Passage of Golubria to grasp the rune as fast as you can, then get out!
• One of the two treasure chambers.
  • In this case, you had the hard part of the two former methods done for you, which is actually gaining control of one of the treasure chambers before the SWARM does. I would advise falling back on one of the strategies I have previously outlined.
• THE WORST SCREEN OF DCSS YOU HAVE EVER SEEN.
  • This is the relevant one.

You first course of action, no matter what, even if you have full health, should be to cast Death's Door. Try not to wince at your entire HP bar going red. Then, quaff a Potion of Attraction. After that, read a Scroll of Immolation. Finally, start the chain reaction by slaying any fool around - I hope that last part won't be too difficult, considering murder has been your number one activity until you came here.

Aside from looking extremely spectacular, this action (which would be completely insane to perform on any non-Felid character) is bound to clear between 50% and 100% of Tomb:3, and possibly you alongside it. You are, after all, taking over a thousand damage in a single turn, if one were to count the addition of death curses and explosions happening all over the place. Death's Door will shield all of it, but like in any good nuclear armaggeddon story, there will be survivors, and they will be pissed. To attempt to survive, first, quaff Cancellation (to remove the Attraction, it won't remove the Death's Door), then read Teleportation again.

Generally, you will be brought out of the atomic fallout, and in a location with absolutely zero enemies - this is because your little artifice was so beautiful that it pulled every single (un)living spirit to watch the fireworks. You can rush to grab the rune if placed nearby, or ascend back up to Tomb:2 if placed in a treasure chamber, only to go down again and attempt a much easier version of Tomb:3.

Of course, there's a non-zero chance you'll just be constantly put back inside the massive crater at the centre of the Tomb no matter how many Teleportation scrolls you force down your throat. In this case, well...

That's what extra lives are for.

Finale

After the final rune has been secured, choose whether or not to challenge the Ziggurat, or to be reasonable and actually go win the game. If you choose the former, know that your score will be slightly reduced due to DCSS's scoring system being based on how many turns it takes you to win. If those little numbers matter to the dopamine squirters in your brain, that is.

The True Absolute Omega-Ultimate Super Hard Final Boss of Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup (Ziggurat)

I lied. It's actually really easy. If you have the right tools. Sadly, Jiyva prohibits a lot of "meta" strategies for clearing this place (mass Conjurations) due to their gooey friends not really understanding the concept of a "blast zone".

Ensure you have:

• 2 lives remaining
• Spell: Death's Door (at 3% failure rate or lower)
• Spell: Ignition (at 20% failure rate or lower, there is so much experience in the Ziggurat that it will rapidly fall to 1%)
• Spell: Passage of Golubria

Optional but strongly recommended:

• Spell: Animate Dead
• Spell: Infestation
• Spell: Death Channel

Can help a little bit:

• Spell: Dragon's Call

Do NOT under any circumstances attempt a Ziggurat without Death's Door. Zig floors are so tiny that your extra lives will do next to nothing by almost respawning you in the same location where you died.

When starting out, the first few floors will be laughably easy - clear them with the same strategies you used in the rest of this run. Stock up on the excellent, high quality loot you can find here, such as Potions of Experience to iron out your last percent points of spell failure, or some of the legendary artifact jewelry coveted by the Felid Empire, such as the Dreamshard Necklace or the Ring of the Mage.

Starting at Zig:5, the heat will start to be turned up, and you should do the same - before descending any staircase, cast Animate Dead, Storm Form, Wereblood, Death Channel and finally Dragon's Call if you have it. Walk forward without hesitation, and the moment you spot some poor souls, immediately cast Infestation on them (if you have it). Then slay them with Manifold Assault. Walk further, covered up by your small gang of shiny scarab/spirit/zombie friends, and uncover the army standing against you, guarding the loot. Really, who even volunteered to be put in this place? Is the pay really that good?

Well, they aren't doing their job right, since you're still alive. Fire them in the literal sense by casting Ignition. The screen will become FLOODED with allies, which will distract a lot of potential run-enders while you mop up the floor. The occasional fire resistant targets can be removed either by the all-consuming undead swarm, or your paradoxically-warped lightning paws. After the loot has been claimed, thank your esteemed business associates, buff yourself again (you may have to artificially wait for Death Channel to be over), and descend to the next layer.

Certain "thematic" floors can be a little bit... different:

• Fire/Gehenna floors - These are nigh impossible to clear with your build, especially if they're full of damnation-hurlers or Orbs of Fire. Refer to the "Escaping a Zig Floor" section below.
• Dis floors - Similar to a Gehenna floor as there's a lot of Fire resistance, but still doable. I recommend buffing up with Brilliance/Haste/Might, but do not hesitate to escape these floors if they turn out to be too hard.
• Snake floors - It's kind of sad, but even though you are a literal god, Salamander Tyrants are still overpowered as hell with their anti-felid damage. Get your rF++ rings on as soon as possible, and survive long enough (possibly using Death's Door) to let them be consumed by the undead swarm.
• Tomb floors - These aren't necessarily hard, but you will absolutely want to use Death's Door before using any kind of Ignition play. Otherwise, well, say goodbye to your minuscule HP bar after you get pelted by a trillion death curses.
• Spider floors - Ghost Moths will instantly remove all of your MP. No problem. All of the enemies in there are utterly trivial, and you can easily blinkbolt into the fray and melee everything to death. If you so wish, drinking a Potion of Magic, casting Death's Door and then reading a Scroll of Immolation will put into action the common saying of "kill them with fire".
• Player Ghost floors - Extremely rare. If you are hapless enough to get one, engage maximum escape overdrive protocols immediately.
• Tartarus floors - These are fairly trivial, aside from the fact that a Silence aura can sometimes be placed exactly where you don't want one to be. Use Blinkbolt to escape it if you foolishly got yourself entangled in one, and use Ignition to delete the Silent Spectre responsible for silencing the sounds of glorious EXPLOSIONS. Psh. It's not like any of your hearing is left after all these trials.
• Slime floors - A freebie! Revel in the cozy lullabies of gurgling and sloshing Jiyva has prepared for you for encouragement. Don't insult them, they're trying their best. Ignore the long-digested loot, and move on to the next floor.

At the bottom of the Ziggurat lies another Figurine of a Ziggurat, and boatloads of loot that you will never be able to use. Maybe the real loot was the friends we made along the way.

Right. You don't have any real friends, only perfectly obedient slaves.

Maybe the real loot was the shallow ego boost you got along the way.

The Scaredy-Cat Protocol (Escaping a Zig Floor)

Engage Death's Door immediately. If you are still very far from the exit, read a Scroll of Teleportation, which is likely to improve your situation. Try to use Passage of Golubria to move towards the exit - the first one is always the hardest. After you have successfully used one portal, you will already be standing on top of a green gate every single time you wish to recast the spell - and can easily press ">" to pass through instead of trying to walk towards one.

If monsters keep stepping inside your portals, use Blinkbolt to approach the exit instead, then spam Scrolls of Blinking with no hesitation. There are so many of these to be found in a Ziggurat, show no mercy for this normally very rare consumable.

When you finally get to the exit, do not let greed consume you. Ignore the loot, and choose whether you wish to abandon this Ziggurat (through the blue portal) or continue. If you're running low on Blink scrolls, I strongly urge you to leave - RNGesus is not universal in their mercy, and nothing really stops them from throwing 3-5 horrible floors on you in a row to annihilate your run.

If I, a player who unironically advises using Potions of Attraction in Tomb, recommend staying away from recklessness... Perhaps I really mean it.

Ascending Beyond Ascension (The End)

Yes, you could do more Ziggurats. It's the exact same strategy every time. Beyond 3, though, you will be forced to dissolve your uniqueness into the sad spell kit that all "megaziggers" share, and also abandon Jiyva because half the spells in that list have never heard of what "collateral damage" means. I never do this, because it's a sure way to randomly get a truly horrible floor that silences you right away and ruins your entire run.

I think it's time to close out this game. Seize the Orb, who has probably been getting quite impatient. Laugh at every Pandemonium Lord who dares stand in your way. Remind them that you are the murderer of their entire family. Proceed to the exit. It's cathartic, really!

If stacking a million status effects is getting too old, here's another ridiculous victory ritual - memorize Sublimation of Blood and Borgnjor's Revivification, and spam the two (preferably using Ctrl-D macros) until you have 20 maximum HP. Cackle at the thought of future readers of your morgue amazed at your insane skill that let you get 15 runes as a character with as much HP as a D:1 Minotaur Berserker. Don't get Damnation-blasted while doing this - but hey, I think the tension is part of the fun.

And so, you have truly beaten DCSS.

If you were wise, you would not come back.

But you will.